#890-891 – see you in 40

Ahh a few familiar things. In the late 2000's I was one of those extremely unique individuals who lived in a factory loft building, with a studio a few floors below. Endless times I was there alone drawing comics and fulfilling orders in the dead of night, walking down a darkened hallway to use a terrifying empty bathroom.

More timely to this strip, I was thinking about the friends who've drifted away with their own loves and successes and passions. Implicit in this strip is that Eve and Hanna won't always live together. I think I meant for "in 40" to have more than one meaning. They will always see each other.

I've personally disappeared to much of the world since I entered my 30s. At some point whether we want it or not, there are no more spontaneous hangs, no more nights that last forever, no more deep moments of intimacy and struggle. It's more work to be friends when you're all busy and your more stubborn features have cemented. But I still see a future with these friends, my dearest ones, the people with whom things are exactly the same even if we haven't seen each other in months or years. They're stars in the sky, distant, anchored and twinkling.

Eve's pose in the final panel mirrors one we saw of Will when Larry returns from vacation.

9 thoughts on “#890-891 – see you in 40

  1. I love this.

    In passing I want to say I wondered at the time if this meant a door was opening for Hanna and Marek.

    But mostly what it makes me think of is how, what with partnerships and careers and children, my enduring friendships have largely transitioned to non-time-sensitive. We don't even have time to talk on the phone about being too busy to see each other. Phone calls are for crises our partners can't help with.

    Texting is how we stay in contact, huge discussion threads. We pour out our inner lives and deliberate about relationships, parenting, finances, who we're becoming, what we want from life.

    I do it from an exercise bike whenever I can since it doesn't cut into anything else. And it gives me something to look forward to late at night.

    Old friends are so precious because newer ones are hard to invest enough time in to get to know someone, to build something, to connect.

    "At some point whether we want it or not, there are no more spontaneous hangs, no more nights that last forever, no more deep moments of intimacy and struggle."

    This is exactly it.
    I hope this comes back someday. Maybe it's a perk of empty nesting, or retirement? Maybe it's too soon to know. Nothing about my parents' economic and social lives has mirrored mine.

  2. When I hit 30 my big soul crushing fear was how long it had been since I'd last had any "nights that last forever" or the crazy unexpected adventures people associate with their 20's. Chronic ache in my knee, gaining weight, time and opportunities seeming to slip away from me more and more… Then barely one month later I found myself post-office-christmas-party on someone's couch at 3am being offered weed and absinthe as thanks for corralling everyone from their absolutely wasted unplanned after-party shenanigans into an uber and to the house of a guy from work who's in more than one metal band in his spare time…

    And I felt this amazing sense of relief that the dumb adventures that ruin your weekend plans will still happen and can still find yourself waking up on a strange couch with a hangover no matter how reclusive and old you let yourself become.

  3. I just want to +1 this whole strip and commentary. Old friends are so good to have and feel like they will last forever. And this is how you make them, a day and an effort at a time.

  4. know this is going to sound cheap and "topical" but I am nearing 30, and it is extraordinarily frustrating to watch my circle float apart the same way meredith is describing here but have it be due almost entirely to quarantine reasons as opposed to any actual loves, successes or passions. Feel pretty cheated on that one.

  5. You can't trick me with your wise words, Meredith Gran. I'm _still_ scared of growing up and having my more stubborn features cement and losing all my friends. Joke's on you!

  6. "At some point whether we want it or not, there are no more spontaneous hangs, no more nights that last forever, no more deep moments of intimacy and struggle."Does this ever ring true. Those very few times where you glimpse that feeling that the current evening has all the makings of a night that could last forever and you do everything in your power to hold on to that only to be pulled away by responsibilities by either you,your friends or both…

  7. I love your writing Meredith! It’s like you know my heart

  8. I’m unclear on where Hanna is here.

  9. This strip hit me with how far Eve and Hannah have come and what a good, strong part of each other's lives they are now. Eve never wanted Hannah and now they're each other's rock, that's something to feel lucky for. There's the looking ahead to the future, and the acknowledgement it won't always be like this, but there's also the focus on and appreciation for the present. Choosing to come home and have dinner. Choosing to call and ask about dinner. Choosing the time you get now, you know?

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